Transcript: Soul Contracts – How To Deal With Difficult People

Soul Contracts – How To Deal With Difficult People

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We all have that one person in our life, and actually, I’m sure we’ve encountered more than one, whether it’s a family member, a friend, a client, or someone else, you’ve encountered difficult person. So today we’re gonna be talking about how to deal with difficult people and look more into soul contracts. Can you break a soul contract? Can you end a soul contract? How do you do it? And I’m gonna be sharing with you a meditation technique too, so stay tuned.

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Welcome to Spiritual and Ambitious. I’m your host, Whitney McNeil. I’m a certified medium and spiritual teacher, and I help spiritual and ambitious souls just like you live your life purpose through your career, and attract abundance by connecting into your intuition and spirit guide. Let’s get spiritual and ambitious.

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Welcome to another episode of the Spiritual and Ambitious podcast. And if you love this podcast, I would appreciate it so much if you’ll share it with a friend, tag me on social, leave a five star review and subscribe so that you never miss an episode. You can find this podcast on your favorite podcast listening app, which you’re probably listening to right now. So you just wanna make sure that you are subscribed so that every episode will be downloaded and you will have them right there. All right, so today we are talking about how to deal with difficult people and soul contracts. Woo, sole contracts. Sounds like, hmm, a little sticky, right? Well, it can’t be a little sticky, to be honest with you. As we walk through this life, we will find people that we are supposed to meet and those people can’t have a contract with us, or they are there to help us learn a lesson or to help heal as well.

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And sometimes there are just people out there that we run into and it doesn’t mean anything humongous or large to our existence. It’s just we’ve encountered them and sometimes it’s really based on how we’re gonna react to these people, right? Because our spirit guides are always saying, oh, you know, is Whitney ready for this lesson or is she kind of completed this lesson? You know how it goes, right? So let’s talk about it. Well, when we incarnate, we are born into family and our family, we really have the biggest lessons to learn. I would say with your family, most of the time, this is where your soul contracts are going to be found. Now, this does not mean that you don’t have a soul contract with someone else. This means that your family really is there to help hold lessons and if you really look at your family, every family has some healing to do.

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Some families look like they get along really easily. However, maybe their lesson is boundaries and they don’t have any boundaries with one another. Some families look like, ooh, they don’t get along at all and you could incarnate and be completely different than your parents and you might even think I must be a different being that this was an accident, like I meant to incarnate on a different planet. What the f*ck, right? We’ve all been there. We’ve seen those memes of babies where they have this grumpy look on their face, and there’s a meme that says, you know, oh, just coming back and realizing that I’m born into this again, or whatever, so understanding that your family really helps play things out. Now you will find within your family, most of the time a soulmate connection and I really feel that the soulmate connection is an easy connection.

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It’s an easy connection that helps support you, an easy connection that helps you a long life, like it’s one of those relationships where you just feel like it’s easy and soulmate connections are not necessarily a romantic. This is more of a, oh, like you’re my soul family, okay, you’re my soulmate. I’ve got you. I see you. You’ve been with me before. And then you have other connections in family that’s like, I’ve seen you too before. Sh*t, Oh, all right, let’s work this stuff out. That’s just how it is. So what do you do? Well, it just really depends on what is going on in that family connection and what kind of difficult person that you’re around. So sometimes the difficult people, especially when you’re younger, are, you know, you can’t really get away from them in some places. Now, I say this with the intent of if you’re really going through something hard or you had a very hard childhood, please seek out a therapist.

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But what I’m trying to tell you here is the first part of your life, you might notice what’s going on with this person. And then as you get older, that’s when we usually do a lot of our healing. And one of the questions I’ll get quite a bit of is, can I break a soul contract? And I wanna rephrase the word break. Ooh. When we think of break, that doesn’t feel good because if you do break a contract on your soul contract, you’re going to end up doing it again. And so what will happen is that you’ll incarnate with this person again or if that person has learned a lesson and fulfilled their end of the contract and you’re just not holding up your end of the bargain, then they can move on. But you’re going to get a different person who I would refer to as a placeholder that will make sure that you are learning that lesson in this lifetime or the next.

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So you can’t really break a contract because it’s gonna happen one way or another. What you can do is end a contract, even if the other person is not ready to end it. If you fulfilled all the things in your contract, it is time for you to end it and you can move on. So for an instance, if you feel like this relationship is come to an end, or this cycle in this relationships come to an end, this pattern, whatever it is, you can choose to move forward with that. And sometimes we make these soul contracts with clients, we make these sole contracts with friends, we make these sole contracts with other people in our life. And when we have these contracts, they can be for a longer time. They can be for a small time just to learn a lesson. It really depends on what you contracted to learn.

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And your spirit guides are in charge of helping you learn it so that’s why we have spirit guides. We have our guides to guide us to people, places, situations, and then we have our protector guides that help protect us and buffer energy, and then we have our teacher guides that teach us in the astral plane and also teach us on the earth plane like, are we learning these things and let me help guide you to a teacher on the earth plane. So you can talk to your teacher guide and you can talk to your higher self, and you can also call on the higher self of the person that is giving you the issue. And you can ask, what do we need to heal? What is going on? I remember, so my first marriage, we were getting a divorce and I called upon his higher self energy and we went on an astral travel.

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And I said, is there anything else that’s left undone, like anything else that needs to be healed? And I looked down and he looked down, I was like, no, we’re good. And one of the meditations, one of the exercises I’ll tell you, is a release exercise that can help you with that soul contract release and I’ll tell you about that a little bit later on. But it was really powerful. So it’s always nice when you’re releasing the ties, the energy with difficult people that you also do so with gratitude. So now let’s talk about other situations. So if you, let’s say you have a difficult client and you’re like, oh my gosh, like I thought this was gonna be a really good idea two years ago, and I’m working with this person, and now they feel like they are a completely different person. And if you’ve been in business long enough, you’ll probably attract somebody like that and they might be like your super fan and then all of a sudden turn into your super nemesis and you are holding a place for them.

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So most of the time in this scenario, I mean, if you’re an entrepreneur, you can say, why did I attract this person? Was I offering something just for the money and I didn’t really wanna do it in the first place? Did I feel out of alignment with my pricing? Was the messaging wrong? Like, you can go through those things, but I’m talking about the energy and sometimes it’s more of a, you’re a teacher and perhaps you are holding this place for this person, and unfortunately you’re in a place where they’re taking it out on you. Now you get to choose not to deal with that because there’s nothing that you really need to heal from this person. They’re not a family member, they’re not a personal relationship connection that you have, while you might care about this person, oftentimes you have to really make sure you’re within your professional boundaries, right?

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So it’s like, oh, well, you know, I care about this person and I’m going to see this person with love, but this person could be triggering things in you. So let’s say that this person is like, your program sucked. I’m mad. It’s just different depending on what’s going on in their, their world. So it’s like maybe they don’t deal with their anger issues, maybe they don’t understand boundaries, maybe they’re mad at you because you’re not giving them enough time and you have to hold those boundaries. Whatever it is, what they say to you might trigger something internally and inside of you where you feel like maybe they’re right. Oh my gosh, maybe I am an imposter. So they’re giving you a gift in a way of dealing with your inner work and making sure that you are showing up the best version that you can be.

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So you could say, I felt a little triggered there, or I need to reinforce my boundaries. I need to have better messaging to make sure I’m attracting the right aligned clients. Whatever it is, you can look at it as, all right, you know, what do I need to do here? But ultimately it’s important that you don’t blame yourself because it’s not most of the time your fault. I mean, we can all take some responsibility in something of, oh, all right, I see you, I, I kind of faltered on my boundaries. I need to put them up but most time it’s their stuff. Whenever they’re thinking most of the time, it’s not a reflection on you, it’s just triggering things. So it’s a great time for you to do more work so that you can regain that worthiness, that confidence of, of who you are. And also it gives you this place to stand in your power when you release these people, whether I’m using clients as an example, it doesn’t have to be clients. This can be family, this can be friends, whatever it is. When you decide to release this person, you can do so with love and grace.

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Now, if somebody is kind of getting angry at you and you don’t feel like it’s justified, it’s really hard to let your ego go. I’m gonna be really clear with you. This happens in family, friends, clients, whomever. It is one of the challenging ways where we’re like, but that’s not right, or, you know, if there’s an entrepreneur out there, if you’re listening, you might have had a charge back at some point, right? And it’s like, but that’s not fair. I have a refund policy in place. And that, let’s say ego comes out, you know, I want to make sure that this is right and you have to listen each time because you might feel like there’s a lesson in it of, yes, I am going to stand up for myself and that’s true. But sometimes the message is, let it go and you’re giving yourself the gift of releasing that person’s energy and releasing that person’s money.

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Like, I don’t want this person a part of my program. And also in families, sometimes you’re giving yourself that gift. This has happened to me recently where I feel like we’re in a pattern. I have this pattern that I have with my family, and you know, I’m asking them to kind of meet me halfway on something and if they refuse to do that, it’s like, all right, instead of arguing about this, because I know it’s never gonna happen and I cannot control the actions of someone else, what can I do that makes it easy on me? So my, I go down the place of not communicating with them as much, not talking about a specific topic as much, or letting them go, perhaps. And with family, friends, whoever they are, if we’re allowing them to leave our lives, maybe they don’t want to, but you want to, sometimes we say, I’m gonna give myself this gift of not arguing.

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I’m gonna give myself this gift of not expending my energy when I know it, there’s nothing that’s gonna be done here. And so you really just need to tap in and tune into you and your energy, because sometimes the message is, I need to say something. I’ve never said anything and it’s time for me to stand up for myself. And sometimes it’s, this isn’t going anywhere. Do you love yourself? It’s a form of self-love to not engage. You know, you could spend three hours of energy battling something, or you could spend three minutes and just let it go so it really depends on what you are feeling. All right. So when we come back from this really quick break, we are going to talk more about what to do when you wanna release the cords. All right, hang in with me, I’ll see you soon.

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This episode is sponsored by my free Spirit guide masterclass. Inside you’ll learn the five Cs of Spirit guide communication, your role with your Spirit guides, two proven effective strategies to stop second guessing yourself and your intuition and the single most important step to understand your intuitive guidance, along with four ways to perceive your spiritual intuitive messages. You’ll also be getting a workbook to go through this class as well. You can join at messengerofspirit.com/freeclass.

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Thanks for hanging in. We’re here on the Spiritual and Ambitious podcast talking about how to deal with difficult people. It’s all contracts and all that kind of stuff. It’s not, let’s say, the topic that we want to hear all the time, but it’s a topic that we need to hear because it happens in life. You might be working a job and you don’t love your coworkers. Now you, if you’re listening to this podcast, you have a seed somewhere within you that wants to start your own business, or maybe you already have your own business. But knowing that sometimes even with that, you know, you have situations. So it could be clients, it could be having conversations with the people that you rent a space from, or the people across the hall or whoever but we’re also talking about family. We’re also talking about friends and family is more complicated because it’s a harder connection to let go of.

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And please seek out a therapist to help you work through that. Friends are a little bit easier to deal with than family, but still hard. We choose our friends because our friends come into our lives at different points and some friendships will fade, some will last lifetimes, and some will come in and out of your life. And it’s just really important to make sure that you’re in alignment and that you’re feeling okay with things. And one of the best ways to do that is through tuning into this whole contract of what you are here to help one another with. So when you are talking with friends and family and clients, usually there’s not a long contract with clients. If you have one at all, they can be placeholders, but friendships, especially tuning into, all right, is this a reciprocal relationship? Now, this doesn’t mean that you see a back and forth, you know, within a month or sometimes even within six months, if you have a long friendship, you might kind of be helping that person for let’s say a year.

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And then you go through a hard time and they help you for a year. Just how does the energy feel? Do I feel like this is draining my energy and they’re an energy vampire? Do I feel like, oh, this is a reciprocal relationship, or, gosh, we’re having a lot of kind of butting of heads here, just we’re not connecting anymore. Tune into the soul contract to really feel if you are complete. So I talked about in the first part of this episode, looking in this meditation. So I’m going to give you a couple things that you can do. One thing that you can do is to ask your spirit guides to come through, and as you’re asking your spirit guides to come through, ask them to help you have a conversation with a higher self of, and then name that person. And then when you’ve named that person, just clear your mind and you can even fall asleep or just have a meditation. Let that spirit part of themselves come through, and so you, we can’t force it. They don’t always come through, but you can request it. And it might not happen in that moment, but it could happen in the dream time, in astral state, or in tomorrow’s meditation. You’re just requesting an invitation. You’re sending one out and hoping that they show up. And then when you do that, you’ll see that person and as that person is there, you can talk to that person and say, what do we still need to work on? You know, what is our contract about? How much time do we have left in this contract? What can I help you with? What can you help me with? And then you can look down clairvoyantly, or if you are an owl, you could hear how many cords you have.

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If you are an empath, you could feel. If you’re a channeler, you can know and just, you know, how many cords do we have? And then just kind of tune into that area. And then once you’ve tuned into that area, so maybe you feel like a heaviness in your heart and you’re like, I don’t know how many. I just know I’m supposed to tune into my heart, or you just have a knowing, you know, feel where it is in your body and then tune in on it. And then I’d like for you to send love. Send love and gratitude, appreciation, and send love, gratitude and appreciation to what they’ve taught you. So maybe this is a person that you just think is kind of evil, you know, in some way, shape or form, and just truly ask in your heart, what did this person help you with?

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So maybe this person helped you with knowing what you do not want to be, knowing who you do not want to be in relationship with, and so you could seriously be grateful of that. I’m so grateful that I have learned from you of who I want in my life, and thank you for showing up and sharing this with me and now I feel that the lesson is complete. Thank you, thank you, thank you and send gratitude down this cord and then see it resolve and dissolve. Now, you might get some other messages like, oh, they need help with this or that, or this or that. But you have to really see, okay, do I feel complete with this contract? And then continue to go down the cords to see what else needs to be shared, and finally what I’ll do is I’ll bring in a beautiful white light and I’ll see it come down from the crown of my head through my body, into my energy.

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And then I send out this white light throughout my aura, and I will say, if there are any cords that reside here, I ask for them to be dissolved, and I am complete and I send it with love. You can’t release without gratitude because if you’re like, oh gosh, I hate you, get out of my life. All that is, is going to be an invitation to keep them there. So if you can say, I really, really appreciate you for showing me X, Y, Z, then let it go. So a lot of times we have trouble with finding what we’re appreciative of and what you can do is think of, oh, what do I hate or that can be a strong word. What do I really not like? When you find what you don’t like, go the opposite. Well, they taught me this. This is the opposite.

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So for instance, if you feel like they’re very, very negative, the opposite is positive. Thank you so much for showing me how to be so positive and that’s what you’re learning for yourself because you are doing the opposite of what they’re doing. So that’s one of those things that you can do. And then of course, you can always write things down on a piece of paper too, or physically have a conversation with them. But really your soul contract is with your spirit, your soul. So you wanna call in their spirit and their soul and see what you can both help one another with. So remember that difficult people, sometimes we get mad at them, and I get it like, I am raising my hand. I have been there and it’s okay to get mad at it. It is, it’s okay. However, you don’t wanna stay in that anger.

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So I will say, well, you know what, this has taught me this and see what triggers may have come up and look at what gift you’re giving yourself of, now I am tightening up my financial policies. I’m tightening up my refund policies. I am speaking my truth. I’m all in making sure to spend energy around X, Y, Z, friends, and I’m making sure that I’m not giving away my energy too much. So this can give you a gift of, this has taught me a lesson, but also, I don’t really have to engage with the difficult people if I don’t want to. Now, I’m not saying just a ghost people because that can be an excuse, but sometimes it, it is the right answer where it’s like, you really don’t have a soul contract with me and you’re just a person online. I am not going to engage with you.

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It is requiring my energy and I’m just going to just focus on my path and ignore. But when you have a sole contract with somebody, like you can’t ignore it. You are gonna have to deal with it at some point. And that doesn’t mean that you have to have a long, lengthy conversation with them if it’s not helpful. It might mean that, hmm, I’m gonna have to deal with it but that means I don’t have to necessarily engage with the anger as we’re moving through. So anyway, I’m going to pull some cards and I hope this has given you some insight as to how to deal with your, with your soul contracts and difficult people and let’s pull some cards and help Spirit shed some light. So the first card just fell out of my hand. So if you’re watching the video on YouTube, you’ll see that it’s fallen.

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But the card was Clarity. Clarity is right around the corner, prepared to make a decision. So that’s our card sitting there on the floor and must have had a lot of energy to come out and down on the floor. The second card I have, oh my gosh, so I just threw two other cards on the floor. Apparently there’s a lot of energy going on. This is the healing card. This is focus on your health, choose it above all else. This is what you need to do to work with your soul contracts and dealing with difficult people. Remember, focus on you. My friend, Patty Linen, I was telling her about this situation, and I felt like somebody was being really petty and you know, I had all my refund policies in place, and this person was still kind of being a jerk. So anyway, I talked to her and she’s like, Whitney, you know, are you like spending too much energy on this when it, it really doesn’t mean anything.

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Like give yourself the gift of just allowing yourself to, to release yourself of this. And I was like, oh yeah. So this is a great reminder. Focus on your health. Choose it above all else, what feels the best for you? Sometimes we’re like, I’m a warrior spirit. I’m gonna get in there and I’m going to battle it out, or whatever it is. Just allow yourself what feels the healthiest for me and sometimes the message is, yes, the healthiest thing for me to do is to speak up or have a conversation, and sometimes the message is no. Mm-hmm. No, I can’t deal with that. No, it’s not gonna happen. And then finally, the last card is the Open Door card. Say yes to new opportunities. So the more that we focus on the positive and we ask Spirit for new opportunities, which also mean new relationships and different clients and things like that, the more we focus on growth and the newness and the positivity, the more we attract that.

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So really, it’s so interesting because a negative person in our life can take up, it’s almost like it’s one person. And then you have, let’s say, you know, 99 other people that are positive and love you and are supportive of you and then you got this one person. It reminds me of like the pee under the mattress, that story, right? Where it’s like this one little thing bothering you, and then it starts taking up all of your energy space, and then you’re just mad about it and you think about it every day, and it’s like, this is one person. This is just one person and look at the energy. I’m giving this one person. So my advice to you is to truly focus on the positive, surround yourself with positive, supportive people, and don’t let other people get your energy, especially those negative people.

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Even if you don’t have a soul contract, you know, just somebody that was mean to you out on the street. It’s like don’t let them take up your energy space. They don’t deserve it. They don’t have a place for it. Now the people that you’ve got this little contracts with, you are going to have to look more into that, but still not allowing them to take up so much of your energy. All right? So I will be back next week with a brand new episode, but until then, here’s to staying spiritual and ambitious.

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Thanks so much for listening to this episode, and if you loved it, would you please share it with a friend? I would also love your review and a reminder to subscribe so you never miss an episode. You can find me at messengerofspirit.com and you can take the four intuitive languages quiz and find show notes there too. If you wanna connect on YouTube, Facebook, or Instagram, you can find me @messengerofspirit. I’ll meet you right here next week. Here’s to staying spiritual and ambitious.

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